Top 8 non-obvious essentials for zombie apocalypse

Ok, so granted, I already have the obvious essentials (guns, a vehicle, ammo, canteens, and a machete). But what are those off-the-wall items that would make survival possible in the event of a full-on zombie takeover? Everyone might have their own preferences, but if you follow my suit, you will be more fit to survive.

Number one: a large pot and a frying pan. The pot will serve two purposes: cooking and water purification by boiling water from streams. The pan will come in handy because you can’t cook eggs on a spit. Also, it will serve as a last resort weapon – even the undead will be knocked down after a devastating blow to the face by a pan.

Two: Footwear. Watertight, durable, and with good traction. Chances are you won’t be walking on concrete; the cities will be overrun with zombies and your only chance is to hit the wilderness. You will need a good pair of boots if you’re going to live off the grid, regardless of the time of year.

Three: Cigars. My reasoning is two-fold. What better way to celebrate a victory over a swarm of biters than by lighting up a nice big maduro? Secondly, in case you happen upon some other survivors, I bet a couple stogies could easily trade for a shovel or some batteries.

Four: Mason jars and lids. Say you find a patch of strawberries or some tomatoes growing during your trek. Eat what you want at the time, but it will be difficult taking all the fruit with you, and even if you do, chances are it will spoil before you can eat all of it. Preserving high-acidic foods such as berries and tomatoes is simple; all you need is a large pot of boiling water and a few jars.

Five: Yeast packets. Assuming that flour will be easy to find in any abandoned house or convenient store (I’m guessing it will be looked over by most people), yeast is the most essential item for bread. Also, if you are an amateur brewer like myself, you can make yourself a pretty good “Apocalypse Ale,” given that you have secured a location to reside in semi-permanently.

Six: Gas cans. Most farms and industrial sites have their own gasoline tanks, so it will be somewhat possible to access gas. You’ll need it to fuel your vehicle and generator if you have one. Also, if you find yourself being chased by a pack of brain eaters, you can lead them into a barn, lock them in, then burn that bad-daddy to the ground.

Seven: An equipped toolbox. Socket set, pliers, crescent wrench, combination screwdriver. This will be enough to keep most mechanical issues at bay. Also, be sure to have some “handyman” tools as well: hammer, nails, and a saw.

Finally: Duct tape. Now I’ve seen duct tape do some amazing things. It can repair a backpack strap, patch up a coolant hose; I’ve even seen it used to seal up a hydraulic line on a tractor. If you have enough duct tape, you can use it to make an impromptu tent or a parka. Duct tape, my friends, could be the difference between staying alive and becoming zombie food.

There they are, my top eight non-obvious essentials for the zombie apocalypse. Take my advice, friends.

Daryl Dixon, Columnist

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