Sandy Sanderford—Spicy Hot Staff Writer
In big news for people wanting to make that “ring by Spring” a reality, a new Core class, CORE-113(“Marriage Counseling”), is now a requirement for incoming freshman.
“Synergy means one plus one equals three,” says professor Lee Pitts, who supports the change.
A scholarship is also available for people who have shown deep commitment to the course in high school and beyond. The money comes from the previous men’s volleyball scholarship, as discussed further in the men’s volleyball article.
Because of Dordt’s ranking as #1 in Student Engagement for two years in a row, it’s more important than ever to make sure students know what they are doing for the rest of their life. In combination with CORE-113, Dordt plans to integrate an M.R.S. program sometime in the future. Administration sees its potential to be a successful major, bringing in students from all over who want this kind of enhanced learning experience.
“Kids these days don’t know how to court properly,” said Dr. Gary Chapman, who will be teaching CORE-113. “We will help you discover yourself and what you want in a potential spouse. We will start with appearances and then move to attainability, because the other person may not always be in your league, and that’s hard for some to realize.”
Chapman is the author of “The 5 Love Languages,” which will be a part of the curriculum. Students will be reading the Bible as well, with emphasis on the Song of Solomon.
The class will watch videos from “Flirting Academy,” a hands-on (wink wink) learning experience to practice what they’ve learned in class. The class will also look at successful marriages and failed marriages to analyze what works and what doesn’t.
Everyone is different. The third focus of the class will be each person’s personality. Because getting friendzoned is not an option, “How to Read Flirting Signals” will be part of the course material. Each student will have tests in front of the class to “feel the pressure” and ultimately get used to different flirting situations.
“Flirting is all a part of courting,” Chapman said. “We will talk about flirting at the gym, in the grocery store, Ritalin flirting… and why it is so crucial to getting the right person. We can’t let this younger generation accept failure.”
The class wants to encourage students to ask important questions: What are your deal breakers, and what are you willing to sacrifice? How do you determine whether the person you want to marry is striving for the same goals you have, and what happens if they are not?
Students who fail this class will be advised to transfer to the nearest monastery.