This article was published in our bimonthly satire issue: The Zircon.
Guinevere Saladbowl—Staff Writer
Dordt is looking to develop these programs even more within the upcoming years, but no one ever expected the program to grow quite as rapidly as it will next semester. This fall, an astounding two hundred new international students are anticipated to attend Dordt, all of them headed in the same direction: the ProTech Manufacturing program. These students all hail from North Korea, and they plan to head back home as soon as they have completed the program.
Over fifty percent of Dordt’s student body come from 500 miles away. With the addition of the two hundred students, this increases to a whopping ninety-seven percent.
One has to think, of all places, why Dordt?
“We need more workers to manufacture things in North Korea,” Jong Un said. “Dordt was more than willing to take our students and teach them quickly and efficiently, and if they do that while teaching this shalom-y stuff, then so be it.”
North Korea’s economy is in need of repair, as the CIA World Factbook reports. Large amounts of spending are focused on military expenses and not on the civilians. In response, North Korea’s Chairman of the Workers Party, Kim Jong Un, took control of the situation. In hopes of increasing production, he hoped to build a fast-track education for future manufacturers.
Dordt still wants to achieve the same things with these students as they do with all students. A Christian worldview and education are still main priorities in the program.
President Hoekstra sees this partnership as a great opportunity to expand the cross-cultural mindset of students currently here at Dordt and the culture of the incoming students.
“Just like the minds of the students, the Dordt community is growing larger,” said Hoekstra. “As this community develops and heads out into the world, they are bringing Shalom to everyone they meet.”
Dordt is in the process of accepting all of the applicants and arranging housing. The main focus as of now is making sure that all of the ProTech students are able to use the program’s facilities despite the number of students. Despite this sudden influx of students, this doesn’t seem to bother other ProTech majors.
“It’s incredible,” says ProTech freshman Johnathan Deer. “We all knew that Dordt was great at building community, but to have students from North Korea come and join the manufacturing program is great!”