Lee’s Advice

Lee Ver Burg – Columnist

Have you ever wondered why Dordt doesn’t have an outdoor swimming pool in the middle of campus? Yeah, I never have either…until just recently. The reason for this random thought probably had something to do with the warming temperature and the beautiful spring air that is being ushered in alongside the songbirds and the growing flowers. But in all seriousness, how cool (see what I did there) would an outdoor pool be?

Columnist Lee VerBurgFirst off, its outdoor…enough said. The All Seasons Center has a beautiful swimming pool, but it’s indoor. You just don’t get the full swimming experience in an indoor swimming pool. Add this to the fact that an outdoor pool in the middle of campus would be a lot more accessible and visual, if you know what I mean. The way things work right now, if your secret crush is out swimming, the only way you could find out would be by walking over to the All Seasons Center and peering into those huge windows (and looking like a complete creeper). But if we had an outdoor pool in the middle of campus, all you would have to do is look outside your dorm-room window with your binoculars in hand, which is still creepy, but less so. And if he/she was swimming, it would just be a hop and a skip away, and you could be swimming right alongside him/her in an instant.

But there are other advantages to an outdoor pool in the middle of campus. Right now, the best option for outdoor swimming is at Sandy Hollow. I have colleagues who have done water projects on the cleanliness of Sandy Hollow water. Two words for you: it’s gross. The water is filled with harmful microbes, poisonous chemicals, and most importantly, pig and cattle feces. Sorry polar plungers! This brings me to my next point: imagine how convenient “polar plunging” would become if we had an outdoor pool in the middle of campus. To complete the challenge, all you would have to do is walk to the middle of campus, say some ridiculous nonsense about nominations and then just jump in the water. And when you’re done, just run back to your room and shower up. Assuming the polar plunge challenge is going to be an annual thing, this new outdoor pool would save a lot of that hassle.

And finally…can someone say “Project Pool Party?” We could start a tradition where every Friday night is a huge campus-wide pool party (no alcoholic beverages allowed). It would be a great mixer event, and it’s sure to bring in quite a crowd. This would work out perfectly because the first month of school is really hot. So for all those poor souls living in dorms without air conditioning, this would be a great way to cool off. And once the summer heat wears off and the temperature drops below freezing, we could use the pool as an ice skating rink. When spring comes around and it’s still too cold for swimming, we could drain the pool and use it as a longboard skate park. The possibilities are endless. So what do you say, Dordt!?

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